i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
North Korea, Best Korea!
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
