There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
false alarm, still single
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
