I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
