Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
