I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
