I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
