We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
