is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
