I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
