big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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