I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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