If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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