I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
