why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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