IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I just had sex on a roof
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
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