quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
