tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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