wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
