I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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