A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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