White coat. Heels.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
