Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
My vagina just recognized that song.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
