go do what you do best...puke behind churches
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
it was like eating out sand paper
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
