We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
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