i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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