I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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