How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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