id be glad to
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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