I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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