is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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