I wannas sexs uuuuu
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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