oh god the rape fog is back!
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
he thought i was a dude.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
