I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
