now i know why i became what i already was.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
