dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
