Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
