Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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