just survived the first fart of the relationship.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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