everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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