just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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