I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
