you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
