I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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