the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
So squirting runs in the family.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
