Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
