I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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