Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
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