YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
