its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
