my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
