Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
